Sunday 11 December 2016

The plot thickens.

https://completelynovel.com/books/exactly-23-days


Hi everyone, wishing you a Happy Christmas, Happy Holidays etc, whatever denomination of faith or not as the case may be, if and however you celebrate, I send my best wishes to you for the holidays was well as wishing you the very best of health and happiness for 2017 and if you are in the midst of chasing dreams, then stay focussed and keep chasing them. 

What did 2016 bring for me? 

It brought hard work marketing my book because as an indie author I have to market my work myself as I have stated previously. I continue to send my words out there via social media, emails and by sending signed physical copies for marketing purposes. In 2016 my book landed in Australia, Brazil, The Philippines, Spain, The USA and Morocco to name but a few. My blog traffic continued to grow both in numbers of readers and geographically. I devoted a lot more time to Instagram and less time to Facebook, as I find Facebook to be less of a successful tool for reader/author contact. I hope for continued growth in 2017 and marketing will remain on my daily agenda. I entered competitions for my book and I also wrote a children's Christmas book which I intend to publish and I will begin a second adult novel in 2017. I will also continue to seek ways to grow as an author and hone my craft by seeking workshops and creative writing classes. 

Commonalities in my life and my book.

For those who have read my book Exactly 23 days you will know that it is dedicated to women and the need to support each other especially in times of trauma. You will also know that the protagonist experienced betrayal on two separate occasions in differing ways throughout the plot and so it was an uncanny co-incidence for me to find myself at the mercy of betrayal in reality in 2016 and this time via a long standing girlfriend. I am not an instigator of trouble, never have been, BUT to quote a lyric from one of my favourite songs, 'I have a right to defend' and it continues, 'over and over again' . And so it has been for many months now that I have chosen to defend myself against one of my ex best friends attempts to continually sabotage my reputation in order to try to ensure that she appeared somewhat 'cleaner' than she actually is. Inevitably in these scenario's, people will jump onto one team or the other or even sit on the fence, which I find both enlightening and frustrating in equal measure. The enlightening aspect being that you get to realise 'who' people really are at their core, as they expose the real them. The frustrating part comes when you can quite clearly see from afar the web they have chosen to enter, in order to leave your life and become trapped in the silken snare of the betrayer. Several people have done that in either a blatant or cowardly manner to me this past few months. Their playground behaviour merely exposes their weaknesses and lack of moral fibre and courage and therefore enhances for me, the realistic core of human beings of very many years standing, that I choose to have in my life on a daily basis. Playground behaviour isn't for me but 'defending my name, my reputation and my integrity' ALWAYS will be. I have defended myself directly with the culprit and in an assertive and dignified manner at all times, without verbal or physical altercations. I will never, ever accept anybody trying to blame me and lie about my reputation as a woman in order to cover up their own behaviour. I have come away from all of this still being able to sleep soundly at night, having the support of my loved ones and my great network of women being at the core of my daily life. Not only do we choose wrongly at times in love relationships but also in friendships too. As is the case here. I am however, emotionally savvy and sound enough to see it for the reality that it is, rather than to dwell upon it as any great loss. I am extremely grateful for the lesson it has taught me and once again the 'wood for the tree's' scenario presented itself to me, albeit 18 years too late. The behaviour was always there but I was just too nice to see it... until I was betrayed and then my right to defend, over and over again kicked in. 

I hope that my protagonist Fi, from Exactly 23 days would be proud of me, as she too is a woman of honour and dignity in the aftermath of betrayal. I also hope that this blog posting touches somebody who needs it. Somebody who maybe questions themselves, doubts themselves and struggles to 'defend' themselves in the aftermath of betrayal, be it from a lover, family member or friend. I say to anybody in that position, in your minds eye, just imagine yourself stood atop of a hill, overlooking the mess going on beneath you and if you truly know in your 'gut' that you HAVE been betrayed, then simply walk away, in your mind, in your heart, in your core being and leave them all to it. We are here on planet earth for such a minute aspect of time, within the billions of years the universe has been around and people who choose to TRY to hurt or betray you are really not worth your inner and outer beauty. Whilst they remain at the bottom of the heap sowing havoc, you get to stand at the top of the hill admiring a different, beautiful ever changing view and take it from me, life is so so peaceful from where I'm standing right now.

Be there for you, be there for the GOOD people in your life and remember to be there for someone who doesn't always feel that they 'have a right to defend'. Nice begets nice.

To my fans worldwide I say thank you for buying my book, for reviewing my book, for sharing my book with others and for reading my blog and following and getting in touch with me on social media. Once again a very, very happy 2017 to everybody. Jayne. 
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Tuesday 27 September 2016

Consistencies

Consistency has been a consistent factor in this writing project from the beginning. I have had a consistent attitude as to how I approached each phase of it. 

In the writing phase I always began my days ensuring nutrition was the first part of any writing day. I made a drinks tray of decaf tea with goats milk and some honey to sweeten it, a large glass of a vegetable and fruit juice (I buy mine from Marks and Spencer's rather than make my own but the quality is superb and they taste delicious) and I drink between 9-12 bottles a week, a glass of lemon and hot water and a large container of cold filtered water (I used a Brita fridge jug) and carried that to my desk. I had a large glass cookie jar filled with health bars such as oat, fruit and nut varieties and I also had another jar on my desk with dried banana's and cranberries for snacking. Breakfast at my desk often included a porridge dish with pears or banana's with a drizzle of honey or maybe sour dough toast with avocado and a poached egg (long before it was a trendy menu item!) and was a great way for me to start my day at my desk, which began with checking the previous days writing to ensure the continuation and flow of the plot. As each chapter was finished it was sent off to my team of reviewers and to my Editor James, who was so efficient, that it was usually fired back to me the same day with his suggested amendments and his sarcastic comments about my mistakes (all in good fun - of course). I also considered any comments made by reviewers as they came through to me via email but mainly they were just requests for the next chapter with the exception of Kate who by default became my second editor given that she added valuable advice that complimented  James' work as my editor. I tended to re-write as I went along and adjusted chapters when editorial advice was offered for consideration or plot changes came into my head. The final aspect of the writing project was a line edit by me which I repeated twice, before each chapter was then once again sent off to James and Kate for their final edits. 

The second phase was the publishing phase and I had already decided via my research that I would be using the publishing company Completelynovel.com. This phase consisted of hours of typesetting conversations, as I wanted my book to be set out in an unusual way and for those of you who have read the book, you will understand why. This phase was a nightmare as I had written my book on my Macbook Pro in ipages and had sent it over to Completelynovel.com in the format requested. They then tried to put it into their editing/typesetting software, which proved so problematic with the pages often coming back to me as pictured below. My draft copy arrived and I made my red pen alterations before sending them page by page to Completelynovel.com. Every time the company tried to re-typeset my amendments it would throw the whole sequence out and any pages 'behind' my amendments would then need reformatting again, which as you can imagine was costly for me in terms of hourly rate typesetting fees and costly for them as a company in terms of time. Eventually after frustrations, tears, re-scheduled book launch dates, fallouts and the near breakdown in my working relationship with Completelynovel.com, I made a decision that although there were still the odd minor issues with the typesetting etc, I could not keep throwing money at the project and I had to be satisfied with where it was at and roll with it. That is hard to do when you are a perfectionist in your work. The lesson for me here is that I will purchase compatible writing software when I send book two to them.



The final phase is the marketing phase which of course I am still in. This phase is very much a work in progress. From a consistency stance my daily routine is to do a social media trawl and or new event posting at the beginning of each day (7 days a week). I use Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and Pinterest regularly and I have recently started to experiment with reddit and Wattpad apps too, although the jury is out at the moment on the effectiveness of these latter two as marketing tools. I trawl the accounts I follow for any opportunity to link my book to a statement or image and do so at the start of each day. I consistently ask friends and followers to share  and re-tweet my social media events, as using your friends and followers helps to spread the message of the day you are posting and also could encourage people to friend request, follow, enquire about your work and even buy your book. This is known as building your author platform and a strong platform makes for a solid building (i.e.: my readership fan base). I have also consistently handed out business cards, posted signed post cards and my most recent strategy is to send signed copies to high profile media people and influential women. The marketing phase is fascinating and during my everyday trawl of the internet I am blown away by the myriad of new ways that I can try to get my work noticed. I am truly loving the marketing phase just as I loved the writing phase. 

I am consistent in my belief in my book and in my gift for writing as a whole and I am consistent in my gratitude for that gift. Consistency in my gratitude to my readers and for their encouraging messages is also a big aspect of this project and I always reply to any messages that people take the time to send me. Consistency in the content of their messages is also very humbling to me and I really do appreciate every one of them. People are consistently telling me they like my book and THAT makes it all so worthwhile. The women love this book which is dedicated to them and the fact that the men write and tell me they love it to is fantastic. It is after all a very relatable book about relationships, betrayal and online dating, which is making people cry and laugh out loud. 

This is  the latest review from a male: Started 'Exactly 23 days' at work last night. Read 173 pages. It's a fantastic read. Can't wait to get to work tonight! 

When I wake up to messages like that from a new reader it really is such a wonderful start to my day. Somebody loves my book and took the time to tell me they did. Wow. I am consistent in my gratitude. Thank you all. 

Update: 

This is the remainder of the review above:

Well finished Exactly 23 days. You asked me to let you know what I thought. Well here goes! Absofuckinglutelylovedit! Not my usual sort of read but it had me gripped. The ending OMG! Seriously, I read it every spare minute I had over my last 2 shifts. I couldn't put it down. Bit bloody clever you are! When's the next one out. Jayne I loved it. Seriously. Brilliant. It put a smile on my face and a lump in my throat, on several occasions. I've put a review on Amazon and told some of lads at work to tell their Mrs's about it. Well done you. Get back to that desk and pen a new one. NOW. xxx

Exactly 23 days is available from: https://completelynovel.com/books/exactly-23-days Barnes & Noble, Waterstones online, Blackwells, apple iBooks and Amazon 



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Thursday 22 September 2016

Ripping off the writer!

Unfortunately scamming and ripping people off are very much the way of the world nowadays as Fi the main character in my debut novel Exactly 23 days knows only too well. It would appear that I too as the writer of the book have to be wary of being conned. It was purely by chance whilst I was at a blogging event today that I discovered that a site in Germany (Bol.com) selling my book had 5,400 views and a score of 8.1/10 for my book. Of course, I was excited at the huge increase in the spread of my words and also at the potential to increase the sale of my book too. It was only on completing a google search when I got home and doing some research on Bol.com that I discovered that they appear to be a rather dubious website with an awful lot of 'one star' negative reviews and not just for book sales. It would appear that books and other items are not being delivered and the authors and artists from music sales on the site will almost certainly never see any of their rightful earnings! 

The purpose of todays post is to warn you about purchasing from a site other than if directed to it by myself as the writer of Exactly 23 days. That way I can make sure that it is a site authorised by me to sell my work. I enclose information for all the sites where you can buy my book and I look forward to your reviews as and when you happen to read it. 

Exactly 23 days is available from https://completelynovel.com/books/exactly-23-days

and from the following online outlets: Barnes & Noble, Amazon, apple iBooks app (for iPad and iPhone), Waterstones, Blackwells and Google Books. 


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Saturday 17 September 2016

What have I learnt?

At the beginning of this blog you may recall that I said I was fully prepared to focus on the final third of this self publishing project just as I had focussed upon the writing and the publishing of my book Exactly 23 days. The final third of the project is the marketing aspect. I received my first copy of the book on the 25/9/2015 and since then I have devoted a part of every day marketing it, however small that may be. 

How have I marketed it and what have I learnt along the way?

I created this blog and have attempted to create new and relevant posts regularly in order to connect with my fans, keep them interested in my work and also to increase awareness of my book.

I have built my social media platforms: Twitter: @jaynelhiggins61, Facebook: Jayne Higgins, Instagram: jaynelhiggins and Pinterest: Jayne Higgins bombarding each of these with any conceivable link to my book in order to increase awareness, connect with other peoples work and hopefully increase my followers and sales.

I have done mail shots of postcards to 100 influential women in the UK.

I have left business cards all over the country whenever I can in cafe's, bars, library shelves, buses, trains including overground, underground and trams and even in ladies loos!

I have chatted to complete strangers and left them with signed postcards.

I have emailed women's magazines, bookstores, newspaper editors, agents, publishing houses, film producers, tv executives and fellow bloggers.

I have researched how to query or pitch my work to agents and publishing houses.

I have emailed libraries, bookstores, supermarkets and online stores to generate an interest in stocking my book.

I have sent signed copies of my book to agents, publishers, newspaper editors, film producers and celebrities.

I have gifted signed copies as prizes for competitions.

I have spent 100's of hours researching how to do all of the above effectively and I discover a new direction of where to send my book on this marketing journey every day! It certainly makes for a very interesting days work.

So what have I learnt?

Always respond to any query or comment from your social media platforms, texts or emails. I feel humbled that complete strangers take the time to comment on a post, or about my book if they have read it and I always thank them for contacting me, buying my book and reviewing it. My fans/readers/followers are the reason I wrote the book. I want to help other people to overcome the emotional and physical pain of betrayal. I want to inspire people to heal. I want to inspire people to move on and I want to encourage women to help each other to heal.  Responding to people who take the time to contact me is showing gratitude and also being respectful of their opinion and their time. 

Respect people's opinions be it a follower who trolls you or an agent who rejects your work. I hear in their words what they have to say and I reply accordingly, be it a polite thank you for their time and their opinion, or as in the case of one of my recent troll comments, I gave her an honest and respectful but also assertive response to her unnecessary and negative comments. It seemed to have the desired effect of silencing her. However, I hasten to add here, that I would NEVER enter into a battle of words with somebody who chooses to want a 'written' argument with me. People are absolutely entitled to dislike my work and comment accordingly, but if I feel justified in giving a balanced counter argument to any misjudgments they make then I will but only if I feel there is a valid reason for doing so and always in a polite and respectful way. 

Be committed to linking each opportunity to your book, after all it could be another sale. Follow book clubs, follow book reviewers, follow agents, editors, readers, fans, and use any connecting links to shout about your own work. Use is as a 'copy and paste' option to your web link, amazon link, blog link, publisher link, any link that will lead them to your own work. Your book is your 'saleable goods', social media is your shop window and your followers are your word of mouth. Don't be afraid to ASK for help, ask them to share the link for you, then ASK them again and then ASK them some more. It will either involve the click of a button or a few minutes of their time to leave an Amazon review. ASK them. What have you got to loose? 

Be committed to the continuance of marketing your book yourself. When I wrote my book I knew when I had come to the end of writing and after edit upon edit, (there are many different types of editing!) I knew I had no more to give that aspect of the job and I know that I will suddenly feel like that about the marketing aspect of the job too but at the moment I am really enjoying getting my words out into the world. 

Be prepared to invest time, effort and undoubtedly money into building a workable website with links to newsletters and to purchase your books and other merchandise. Dedicate the bulk of your website to your work as a writer and possibly hints of your daily life. A great example of such a website for me is, The Pioneer Woman Ree Drummond.. An award winning blog and website, she is tv celebrity cook, wife, mother, photographer and writer. It's a great blog/website and I aspire to build one of that quality and interest. My website is however very much a work in progress. 

I've absolutely learnt that every day is a learning curve and that what I am doing is exactly what I have discovered other famous authors doing as they too release new books. I've learnt too, that I get to high five some of my peers, albeit imaginary, in accomplishing both a published piece of work and for going in the right direction along this marketing highway. 

Which direction? Oh yes, straight ahead. For now anyway! 

https://completelynovel.com/books/exactly-23-days      


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Wednesday 24 August 2016

Relatable

Dedication taken from the novel 'Exactly 23 days' which is a story of survival for women.
When your heart has been shredded and you are left to pick yourself up to recover from lies, betrayal, trauma, emotional and financial abuse, to name just a few of the list of effects, bestowed upon us by partners who chose to be unfaithful and betray us, be it in reality or online, I just want you to know you WILL survive, you CAN do it.
It takes the seconds which seem like they are as long as a day, to eventually turn into manageable minutes, that then become a goal of an hour, followed by aiming to survive the never ending days and nights, when you don’t want daytime to come and you cannot wait for night time to fall once more, to allow you the peace of knowing you have survived another day. Believe me, you do have it in you. Dig deep and do what is required to get through those seconds, minutes, hours and days. It could be screaming as loud as you can, it could be dancing and singing like nobody can see or hear you, it could be power walking like you have batteries inside you, refusing to die, it could be a peaceful soak in the bath, it could be crying until you can cry no more, it could be grabbing precious time with your children, it could be choosing to drink a fruit drink and eat a yoghurt because that’s all you can face eating, it could be writing in your journal, explaining how you feel about those who chose to hurt you, it could be snatched moments of laughing with your friends until the tears roll down your legs. Whatever helps you, do it.
Just believe, have faith in yourself, trust your craziness, trust your recovery, trust your relapses, trust that you are doing great, as you are able to tick off another day in your head, knowing that your life is going to be so much more fulfilled without having somebody difficult in it, who just did not deserve to be there. I am a firm believer in Karma and the law of attraction. Whilst sitting in my garden watching the recent eclipse, it made me realise the level of the precision of the alignments of the planets, which brought such a spectacle of nature and how infrequently that alignment happens. I believe our lives are also about precision and alignment and that we are meant to be on the journey we are on and that better things are coming our way. Don’t let somebody who chose to walk out on your dreams let you believe your dreams are over. Create a new dream, a new goal. What have you always, always wanted to do? Go out there and do it. Right now. Start your dream machine but make sure that you have taken the time to ask yourself what you have learnt from the nightmare you have just emerged from first. There was a lesson to learn. Make sure you understand what it was and prevent yourself from reliving the nightmare.
Be good to YOU, all day, every day and goodness will come your way. Only you can mend you. Not your doctor, not your friends, not your family, not your work colleagues, not your neighbours and not your children. They might all want to be there for some of the journey, to help you recover but ultimately it is you and only you, who can do it. Look yourself in the eye, in the mirror and tell yourself no- body is worth keeping you in that place of pain and despair. Chose to smile and feel the wind in your hair, chose to laugh, chose to bath, chose to eat, chose a treat, chose a new look, chose a new book, chose the gym, chose to be slim, chose a walk, chose to talk, chose tears, chose to dispel your fears, chose whatever it is you need to get through the seconds, minutes, hours, days, nights, weeks, months to the ‘you’ that was there all along. You can do it and you will do it.
When you know you are finally mended, spread the word, hold out your hand, share some love from your heart and some laughter from your soul and be there for a new member of the sisterhood who needs your help. Let’s all help all our sisters worldwide to stand tall and know, they can and they will recover, survive and thrive, to live the life they deserve.

To all the sisters who reached out and held my hand in what ever way you could, who cried my tears with me, and laughed my laughter too, I thank every one of you. I survived. Jayne.
The above is taken from my debut novel Exactly 23 days and it warms my heart when I get messages from strangers telling me that the words I have written have impacted upon them in one way or another. One of todays messages via a third party says, 'Thank you so much for that book, I can relate to every word, it's like I was meant to read it to get my life in order'. There are a few recurring threads among the feedback and reviews for my book and they are: a need to know when my next book is out, 'unputdownable' comments and 'relatable' comments. I have said many times that my motivation to write the book was to help other women and I am so happy to hear the recurring message that people are finding the contents of the plot relatable, helpful, hopeful and inspiring. I am humbled and honoured that people choose to comment. It inspires me for sure. Thank you.

To purchase the book click the link or go to apple iBooks, Waterstones UK, Barnes and Noble or Amazon UK.  


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Sunday 21 August 2016

Olympic standards. Nothing else will do.

Whenever I am introduced to people as a writer, I am usually greeted with something along the lines of, "Oh really? Published?" closely followed by, "How is it doing, sold any?" 

That's a strange question to answer because selling books, as I have said before, is NOT what motivated me to write this book. I was motivated to help other people, especially women to overcome betrayal but actually I have been pleasantly surprised that the men who have purchased and read my book are tending to send me personal reviews of their enjoyment of the book, thank me for writing it and to comment on the main character, Fi. Fi is a sensitive but cheeky woman, she embraces her sadness but she is also hilarious, is casual in her appearance but can be damn sexy too but more importantly she has a core of kindness and fairness until people choose to betray her and then her feisty side emerges! Is it any wonder she appeals to male readers too? 

I could answer the sales question by quoting the actual numbers, I could 'play the figures down' by trying to explain the slow start in sales or I could even 'big it up' by exaggerating the sales figures. BUT the sales figures are not what drives me to continue as a writer, otherwise I wouldn't be a writer for the right reasons. There is no question that I will be a writer forever. As I have said before, words have been in my veins since I was a small child. I am a writer. 

So how do I answer the question? 

Well writing is my passion and I have a flair for my craft according to my readers, many of whom have uttered the words, "can't wait for the next book," and as a matter of fact I too, believe I have a flair for writing. As with any passion that you wish to pursue, you have to practice and hone your skills. You hear of bands who have relentlessly toured the country, Europe or the globe, sleeping in a transit van and playing small gig after small gig before eventually emerging to have their music played on the radio, playing bigger and bigger venues and finally playing world renowned stadiums and festivals. Cold Play, REM et al come to mind. I have been honing my craft since I began studying again for my social care career, later as a court report writer in the probation service, by completing creative writing text book exercises sat at my desk, whilst sat on a beach years ago on Anglesey and even when sitting bolt upright in bed at 3am because an idea has been a part of a dream! 

I am that band member in the back of the van. I am that athlete who has dedicated years of relentless practice before finally standing on that podium. The difference being, I don't collect medals and I don't hear the crowd singing back at me as I belt out their favourite tune. I do however, appear to be consistently collecting (via my email, Messenger, Facebook and Instagram accounts) very positive feedback from people who have bought my book, who have really enjoyed reading it and then taken the time to send me their thoughts via a review. 

And so when people do ask me "How's it going, any sales?" My answer to the question is this, "I liken myself to the new band gigging in the pub at their first gig, or the runner out practicing in the pouring rain in the dark at the junior stages of his career. I am a self published writer dedicating my life to the marketing phase of getting my debut novel out there in the world."

Just as the band will have 3 people in a crowd and remember that gig as much as they will remember their first Glastonbury and the athlete will remember their first junior title as much as they will winning their first Olympic gold medal, I will remember all my emails, social media contact and face to face feedback that people so kindly convey to me about how my words have impacted upon them. I have made people laugh, I have made people cry, I have given people hope of a true and fulfilled love and I have people waiting for my next novel. That's not bad for a debut novelist.  
How's it going? It's going great. So thank you for asking. 

However, I won't lie and say I wouldn't like to break out into the big time! Just as the band member and the athlete does! But just like the athlete's who stood on the podium this past two weeks and told youngsters out their to follow their dreams and work hard for the gold medal, I too will continue to work very very hard to follow my dream of becoming an award winning author. And so I ask all of those who have read my book, please can you take the trouble to review it on Amazon, because 20-25 reviews means Amazon will include my book in their 'also bought' and 'you might like this' lists, which increases visibility on the site and may increase sales for an author. However, 50-70 reviews and Amazon then highlights the book for spotlight positions and it's newsletter feature, which could potentially mean a HUGE boost in sales for an author. Reviews really do help self published authors in particular to sell more books as part of their marketing strategy. And so this last paragraph was yet another 'music gig' or a 'pouring rain practice run' for me and I need the crowd to get behind me now!! 

To purchase the book click the link or go to apple iBooks, Waterstones UK, Barnes and Noble or Amazon UK. 

https://completelynovel.com/books/exactly-23-days
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Thursday 19 May 2016

Reviewing the review of the reviews!




These are the latest reviews for Exactly 23 days.

Really enjoyed this book. Very hard to put down and the author had me in stitches the whole way through. Not the ending you would expect!! Great feel good book to read on the beach this summer.


I'm so fed up Jayne I have finished your amazing book, Exactly 23 days. I didn't want it to end. I can relate to so much in your book and I have laughed & cried at your journey and felt your heartache. Well done!!!! (female 50’s)


Well this has been an excellent read whilst on holiday in Tenerife Jayne Higgins. You write so beautifully, well done. (female 50’s)


Just finished reading your book, wow Jayne what a story!!! Unbelievable that this happened to you so soon after your split from your husband. I couldn't put it down at one point and the book made me laugh and made me cry all the way through, well done you. Now get on with the next one. (female 60’s)


Hi Jayne, I have literally just finished reading your book and I wanted to let you know how amazing it is! You have such a lovely style of writing that makes you feel that you are right there in the story alongside Fi. The story is very real too which makes it very relatable and easily flows. I have read some books in the past that are too way out there for the normal persons lifestyle and in being like that, for me, I find it really hard to follow the book as I cannot relate to them. Your book is so very relatable.I love how Fi gives herself structure and a daily routine to centre herself for the rest of the day. Little things like that make me smile so it was nice to see someone else doing those things too. I could not put it down (well only in the times when I had to look after the kids, cook and clean etc! Ha!).Not only is this story such a lovely read, it is also very inspiring. It really makes you think that anything is achievable if you really put your mind, and heart and soul to it. Please let me know if you have any other books published as I am now definitely a fan of your amazing work! I am sure you are really proud of all you have achieved and you should be! Well done! (female 30’s)


I have not read a book since I was 16 and it was compulsory to do so at school, I couldn't put it down. I couldn't wait to get to the end which had some amazing twists! (male 40's)


I'm really enjoying your wonderfully written and funny book Jayne!! Clever lady! (female 40's)


Two words: Love it! (female 40's)


I can really see this as a movie! (male 50's)


You are correct Jayne .. Chapter 13 is a masterpiece. I am really not sure why ... But it made me cry .. and cry like a baby ...If nothing else you have introduced me to an amazing book ... I never read, never have done ... Maybe two books in ten years but this book has really got to me and I can now understand why you are so very proud of your book .... I have not finished the chapter yet but I want anybody and everyone to read your work ....Amazing book ... Thank you for writing it and (if I can stop bloody crying) I will get on with reading it! (male 50’s)


These are just a selection of the reviews and the men are loving it too! 


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Wednesday 18 May 2016

Can we spot the red warning flags and do we listen to our head or our heart or should we really only be listening and trusting our gut instinct?

Exactly 23 days is about betrayal in more than one guise. 

Not only is the main character the victim of the 'usual suspect' of having had one's husband engage in an affair but there is another betrayal for her too. I won't disclose the details of that second betrayal in this blog post because I don't want to be responsible for a spoiler alert for readers but it was completely unexpected and floors her just as her husbands affair had done. In her analysis post betrayal, she wondered if she could have seen those red flags that may have been warning her and therefore prevented the avalanche of pain that subsequently followed. 

Red flags apply to many aspects of relationships and not specifically to betrayal, so what can we do to make sure that we heed our inbuilt warning systems and look after our emotional and physical selves. 

One thing I have learnt when a relationship ends is that when you go right back to the very beginning with your magnifying glass and look really, really closely, you will see that there may not have been huge red flags waving at you BUT there was most definitely 'red bunting' fluttering in the breeze. So why did you ignore the bunting? Why did you wait until the huge red flag was right in front of you, ready to wrap itself around you like an 'I told you so' blanket? 

New relationships are meant to be fun, exciting, happy, full of hope and certainly something better than we have had before. After all you are not going to repeat that behaviour and get wrapped up and trapped again are you? Surely not. 

There is such a feeling of euphoria when you really 'like' somebody new. You don't want to think anything suspicious or bad about them because a) you wouldn't choose to think bad of somebody from the get go would you? Not when you are motivated from a core of kindness, (you only want to see the good in EVERYBODY), right? and b) you wouldn't choose somebody who had the capacity to wave red flags right in front of your face. You are a savvy, streetwise, educated woman. You're not going to KEEP getting it wrong surely!     

But what if your magnifying glass is dirty and you cannot see the 'red bunting' fluttering in the distance? The shitty attitude that he has when you didn't answer a text straight away, the raised eyebrows when you say you have a housing plan with a girlfriend that doesn't involve him, the 'slipped in' statement that he had jealousy issues in a previous relationship, the 'timetabled', detailed planning of everything you did together, the secrecy with his mobile phone, the excuses to take the dogs out for the fifth time that day, the overtime on his day off, the sudden enthusiasm to do the dishes when previously he had had a continuous affair with the sofa! etc, etc. 

You didn't see it because it was all so nicely gift wrapped in flowers, chocolates, nice meals out, impressive Valentines gifts, unusual birthday gifts, bottles of Prosecco, live music and dancing, great holidays, fun, laughter and tied up nicely with the pretty ribbons of attention, compliments galore, tender kisses that led to crescendo kisses, great sex and the euphoria of the feeling inside you when he declared that he loved you! 

What woman wouldn't want all of that? That's a perfect relationship isn't it? No bunting, no red flags, don't be stupid you tell yourself, you just 'imagined' that negative thought, you are paranoid because of past hurt. This guy is so nice!

Well HELL NO! Listen to the fluttering sound of that 'red bunting' because just over the horizon are the huge red flags of realism ready to be blown in on the breeze to waft against your body before the hurricane force winds eventually arrive and wrap that motherfucker red flag right around you like you are a swaddled baby who cannot escape! And then what? 

You're deeply involved by now, not only does he love you but you quite obviously love him too, you have children together, you work every hour god sends and he now controls your wages, your girlfriends have long gone because he now controls every aspect of your life. "Why have you done that?", "Why haven't you done this?", "I told you I wanted so and so?," "You're not going there", "you're not having that", "why are you texting him/her?" You are now so wrapped up and tightly bound by that red flag, that it might as well be a straight jacket. You can't escape. He's trapped you. Emotionally, financially and very likely physically too.

You look a shadow of your former self, there is pain in your eyes, your heart and your soul. You don't sleep, you either over eat or starve yourself, you dread him coming home, you dread his text messages, you dread him kissing you because you know he wants a shag (he no longer makes love to you, if indeed he ever did!), you dread the dawning light of each new day and you dread the fading light of each and every night. You dread every aspect of your life with him. 

You are now trapped in the vortex of abuse but until you realise that 'abuse' actually comes in many forms, you will keep trying to climb out of that vortex again and again. Where will you go, who can help?, nobody cares, I need him to survive, I can't manage financially on my own, I can't put my children through the misery of separating them from their dad, what will happen to the dogs, what if he finds me when I've gone? These are just some of the cogs going round and round in your head as you try to make sense of how you came to be so trapped. 

Trust yourself first and foremost. There is ALWAYS an answer and a way out and help IS always nearby but the answer and the help need searching for by YOU! They are not coming to you. Go out there and free yourself, free your soul, free your mind, free your heart, free your children. Find that help that is most definitely there. Slowly begin to enjoy your re-birth and as you embark on your journey don't listen to your heart, don't listen to your head, listen loud and clear to the flutter of the 'red bunting' as it gently warns you that the red flags are coming and that they are harsh, brutal, uncaring and patiently waiting to rob you of your core. Embrace the red bunting, smile inside as you recognise the symptoms of previous behaviours and listen to your new best friend, who just happens to be your 'GUT' feeling and practice acting upon those feelings in all aspects of your life and enjoy the new journey that is taking you to the most amazing adventure, free from disrespect and abuse and learn to love, respect and have pride in the new you that emerges. 

I love red bunting! The Red flags don't get anywhere near me anymore. 

     
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Tuesday 9 February 2016

How are you?

Hello. How are you? Time flies doesn't it and I cannot believe that over a month has gone by since my last blog post and that is a stark reminder to me of the fast ticking away of our lives. We won't be on this journey again. We will not be able to revisit once our journey here is done and so that is all the more reason why we should be doing two things whilst we are here. Firstly we should be being the best person we possibly can be to ensure goodness flows in our lives (what you give is what you get, karma 'what goes around comes around', the law of attraction), however you view and contribute to the life you live comes right back at you. I truly believe that. So lets all carry on paying it forward and helping each other. We are all creatures of this magnificent place called earth and we should respect each other more and that means all species in my world! Even the tiniest gestures can make such a huge difference to a persons day so keep kind in mind! 

The second thing we should be doing is going for our dreams. What is your dream whilst you are here on earth? My dream is to write and  to get my published work out there and the only way that is happening is if I 'work out how to work that out'. Nobody is bringing my dream to me, it is mine, I dreamt it and I have to make that dream become a reality and I am working relentlessly every day to get my first published book out there into the wider world. People who are local to my world were constantly telling me that they loved my book in many different ways, when they reviewed it as the chapters emerged. Then the slowly rippling pond started to reflect the same opinions of my work from new readers and that added to my growing self belief in my writing. I have always believed in it to an extent because I love it and I am passionate about what I do. I am also a perfectionist in attempting to deliver a good piece of writing, whether that was in my previous career, in the writing I send to a friend on their birthday or in my scribbled notes for future work, or for my current book. Do the very best you can and then do it again and again and don't stop until it IS the best possible piece of work you can do is what drives me in my writing. Every time.

If you're a runner, run again, if your a cake maker, bake another one, if you're a potter, throw another clay on the wheel! Be determined that ONLY the best is ever good enough to send out there. Strive for the best you can do and when you are ready go out there and run, bake, create, write, whatever your dream is, just go out there and do it again and again and again until you are living it. Really living it, so that it becomes the new you, you are 'living' in that dream and no longer dreaming it. It needs to be your absolute focus so literally, that nothing else matters. I am doing that now and I am NEVER turning around. I am a writer and my words are slowly getting out there in the bigger world and that fills me with joy as new readers now contact me (people I do not know on a daily basis) to tell me that they too find my work inspiring, relatable, sad, funny etc etc. Yes I really am living my dream. So why don't you give yourself permission to live yours. We are not passing this way again. 

Sweet dreams readers and thank you for stopping by and looking in on my dreams. Good luck. 

https://completelynovel.com/books/exactly-23-days



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Saturday 2 January 2016

Did you throw out the old year in readiness for the new one?

A very happy New Year to you all. Where ever you are from my little corner of the world as I enter yours via the wonder of satellite technology and online media, I wish you a wonderful 2016. I wish you a healthy year or a healthier year at least, if, like me, you have a challenging diagnosis. I wish you a happy year or a happier year if 2015 was lacking in the happiness stakes for you and I wish you all wealth too. 

What does wealth mean to me? Well initially the thoughts of 'more money' come to mind, so that I can buy, or get things for people that I love and care about and for myself too of course, but actually I love to 'give' to others and I am so glad my childhood instilled that gift of giving into me. I have a limited income and cannot possibly give as much as I would love to, to all those I cherish? Or can I? Of course I can. I can give many many things other than money and things. 

I have started my 2016 giving plan today by emptying a wardrobe of electrical and kitchen items stored there, that I will never use again. I will give them to offenders who are setting up home again after serving prison sentences. 

I am starting a life changing food regime on Monday and my cupboards, fridge and freezer will be emptied in readiness for the new shopping list and so all that produce will be given to a homeless shelter. A new food regime also means a new body shape and so my wardrobes and clothes drawers will be organised and all the excesses, never to be worn again, will be given to my local charity shops. 

As well as giving away THINGS! I will give more of my time away in 2016 to the 'things' close to my heart, in order to ease others pain.

I will do that by giving more time to the elderly widows that I love to spend time with at our teatime eat treats!and I intend to contact an elderly charity about 'Sharing Sunday's' to encourage an elderly person to come and share a Sunday meal with me and mine. 

I will also donate some of my time to Millie's Trust (an organisation set up by a mother and father who's child choked to death whilst at a daycare centre) and her parents have devoted their lives since the death of their daughter to preventing other children experiencing a lack of first aid care whilst attending nursery. They have won multiple well deserved awards and even put enough pressure upon the government to get Paediatric First Aid legislation changed here in the UK. A fantastic charity that I have registered my interest with that I will give my time to in 2016. Check them out at info@milliestrust.com

I also intend to help Gift of a Wedding again in 2016. This is another incredible charity that gifts weddings to people who are terminally ill or who have a life altering challenging illness and they do this by sourcing every aspect of a wedding, that the happy couple desire, often with very limited timescales due to the severity of illness and imminent death of one of the recipients of the weddings. Again a wholly worthwhile charity that you can check out at www.giftofawedding.org

I will give time to my children in 2016 to help them in whatever way I can as their mum. I adore my children and I am fortunate that I have two happy, healthy children who are making their way in the world! A mums job is never done. EVER.  

I will give time to my friends in their times of need in 2016. 2015 presented many of my circle of girlfriends with challenges to their health, wealth and happiness (including myself) and we were all there for each other as we always are, to pull each other back up and face the wrong turnings of our live's in order to soldier on! 

I will give my friends laughter too in 2016. Girly giggles and belly laughing shrieks until the tears roll and we need the Tenna ladies again, because that is what they give me in so many many instances. Knowing I am going round to a girlfriends or having a girly meal out or a girls night on the town drinking and dancing or having a fire pit night in the garden, whatever it is, it will be amazing because we are all there for one thing only, to 'give' to each other. A hug, a smile, a glass or two, the best lemon cake EVER or laughter. It's the best present you could ever give to anyone, 'giving' something of yourself for someone else, whether it's for their health, their wealth or their happiness. 

I will also be giving my words to my readers in the form of my blog, my social media presence and through my current book: https://completelynovel.com/books/exactly-23-days and possibly via new words too if I publish more work in 2016, I will certainly be writing more stuff in readiness for publishing! Words too, are a lovely gift to give, full of comfort, peace, solace, encouragement, motivation, reassurance, laughter etc etc. 

Words really can be a fabulous gift and 2015 saw me throw away people, things, and words that were no good for me in readiness for the joys of health, wealth and happiness coming mine and your way in 2016. Happy, healthy and wealthy you for 2016.  

What will you be 'giving' in 2016? 
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